Axe Puns

Axe Puns

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If you’re looking for a cutting-edge way to spice up your vocabulary, then get ready to chop your way through this article on axe puns! Whether you’re a seasoned lumberjack or just a casual fan of woodsy wordplay, these axe-citing puns are sure to axe-tually tickle your funny bone and leave you splitting with laughter.

From the classic “axe-ident” to the clever “axe-quisite,” these puns are sharp, witty, and perfect for any occasion. Need a pun for a camping trip? How about “axe-ceptional”? Want to impress your friends with some wordplay at the lumberyard? Try “axe-traordinary.” These puns are so sharp, they’ll cut right through the monotony of everyday conversation and leave your audience axe-hilarated.

So why settle for dull conversation when you can axe-ceed expectations with these axe-ceptional puns? Whether you’re looking to impress your friends, add some humor to your writing, or axe-pand your online reach, these axe-traordinary puns are sure to do the trick. So grab your virtual axe and get ready to chop your way through this article – you won’t be disappointed! Get ready to axe-tivate your sense of humor and axe-perience the joy of axe-tastic wordplay like never before.

 

Funny Axe Puns

  • I used to watch the best TV show about lumberjacks. I was sad when it got axed.
  • Wow, what an axecellent throw!
  • Please don’t axe me to help, I have no idea how to handle this situation.
  • I donated a golden axe to the lumberjack society the other day. I’m just a sucker for a random axe of kindness.
  • Turns out there are TWO Loch Ness Monsters! One of them is quite mean, but the other actually gives away his forestry tools. A little weird, sure, but it’s always nice to see some random axe of Kind Ness.
  • The man failed at being a standup comedian, but when he retrained, he really excelled in his career as a lumberjack. I wasn’t surprised, he was a total hack.
  • Three-dimensional tools are so much better than anything else for chopping down trees. It’s because they all have three axes.
  • What did one deodorant say to the other? I can’t understand you, your axe scent is too strong.
  • I got struck by a golden axe. Au!
  • A guy sprayed so much body spray, causing a few people to suffocate. He was registered as an axe murderer.
  • Finally, the lumberjack has recovered from his injury. He’s back in axe-tion.
  • The lumberjack didn’t know what to do when his axe broke. He was really stumped.
  • How can you tell that an axe thrower loves his assistant? He always misses her!
  • What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cutting your toe off with an axe!
  • An axe walks into a forest, and the trees say: “At least the handle is one of us!”.
  • Little Johnny’s teacher asks: “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree but also admitted doing it. Do any of you know why his father didn’t punish him?” Little Johnny replies: “Because George was the one holding the axe?”.
  • What food is an axe murderer’s favorite aphrodisiac? Chopped dates!
  • I’ve heard that people in my town have been throwing axes at trees in the middle of the night. There doesn’t seem to be any reason for it, it seems like they are just random axe of violence.
  • Axe Body Spray have decided to make a new scent called “English.” That way, when you wear it, you can say that you have an English Axe scent.
  • My friend got arrested for saying he was an axe murderer. Turns out he’s just a really bad guitarist.
  • I spent two hours looking for my axe. And then it hit me!
  • It’s difficult to understand what these lumberjacks are trying to say because they speak with a thick axe-cent.
  • During a biology lesson, the teacher asks her student, “What separates your head from your body? The student innocently answers, “The axe!”.
  • I have a scar from an axe on my finger. It was an axident.
  • In court, an axe murderer said to the judge: “I am innocent. It was only an axident!”
  • In the middle of the battle, the soldier pulled his comrade aside and said: “Just take a few minutes to rel-axe! I don’t want you to get a splitting headache!”
  • I love your random axes of kindness!
  • Don’t be a pain in the axe!
  • Where does a lumberjack buy his axes? At the “Chopping Maul.”
  • My friend got arrested for saying he was an axe murderer. Turns out he’s just a really bad guitarist.
  • I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth. Now when I talk, I have this weird axe-scent!
  • During a biology lesson, the teacher asks her student, “What separates your head from your body? The student innocently answers, “The axe!”.
  • I axe myself whether it is really necessary to chop down that tree in my garden.
  • It’s difficult to understand what these lumberjacks are trying to say because they speak with a thick axe-cent.
  • In court, an axe murderer said to the judge: “I am innocent. It was only an axident!”
  • I spent two hours looking for my axe. And then it hit me!
  • Did you hear about the lumberjack who lost his job? They gave him the axe, he just couldn’t hack it.
  • During a biology lesson, the teacher asks her student, “What separates your head from your body? The student innocently answers, “The axe!”.
  • In the middle of the battle, the soldier pulled his comrade aside and said: “Just take a few minutes to rel-axe! I don’t want you to get a splitting headache!”.
  • I came home to find an axe buried in my PC. I think it has been hacked!
  • “Son, where did you learn to use an axe like that?”.”In the Sahara Forest”. “Don’t you mean the Sahara Desert?”. “Well sir, that’s what they call it now!”.
  • What do you call a car crash with a lumberjack? An axident.
  • I killed a dentist with an axe but only got charged with manslaughter. My lawyer said it was an axe-a-dental death.
  • I have an axe that was once owned by George Washington. My great-great-grandfather had to replace the handle. And my grandfather had to replace the blade, but it’s Washington’s axe.
  • Why was the spreadsheet afraid of its chart? Because it has multiple axes.
  • I saw a guy today with soot all over his face carrying a large pick axe and wearing a royal blue hardhat that matched his overalls. But these are just miner details.
  • Axe a silly question and you’ll get a silly answer!
  • I was disappointed when it turned out the axe I bought to climb with was useless for the job. It was an anti-climb axe.
  • I must axe you a question.
  • What would a lumberjack do with an egg? They would hatchet.
  • Sorry mate, I broke your axe head. Hope you can handle it.
  • Only two things in life are certain: death and axes. The former usually follows the latter.
  • I made a bad joke about an axe. No one laughed. It wasn’t very cleaver.
  • Let me axe you a question. It’s about your neck…
  • Why did the chicken put the egg on an axe? To hatchet.
  • I’m addicted to ordering hatchets from other countries because of the smell. I love foreign axe scents.
  • A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead all join a tournament. They can bring any weapon they choose, and the only rule is that the first person to draw blood wins. The brunette walks in with a badass double-edged axe, the redhead walks in with a huge longsword, and the blonde shows up with a red marker.
  • I always like bragging about the very small hatchet I own. I’ve done some research on it, and as it turns out, it’s from the 1850’s and was used in some rich guy’s home to chop up citrus fruits for desserts and cakes. My wife thinks it’s boring, she says, “it’s just an antique lime axe”.
  • Let’s kick axe!
  • The lumberjack who was constantly late for work said to his boss: “Don’t axe me, I don’t know how to handle this!”.
  • Great axepectations.
  • Two axes argued for ages, and finally, one said to the other: “I think it’s time we bury the hatchet!”.
  • The lumberjack who was constantly late for work said to his boss: “Don’t axe me, I don’t know how to handle this!”.
  • How axeciting!

 

We’ve gotten to the end of the list of axe puns and axe-citing puns about axe that tingles everyone. Share these puns about axe with your axe throwig friends.